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Writing Samples
Band 6

Longer life spans and improvements in the health of older people suggest that people over the age of sixty-five can continue to live full and active lives. In what ways can society benefit from the contribution that older people can make?

#life #improvements #health #people #age #sixty-five #lives #society #benefit #contribution
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The extent to which older individuals can contribute to
society
Use synonyms
 and play an active role in their community, is greatly affected by their autonomy and independence.
This
Linking Words
 essay will demonstrate how investing in the welfare of older people can palpably and noticeably have a positive impact on
society
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the awareness over the past few years
of
Suggestion
about
 the need to invest in the overall health and
wellbeing
Suggestion
well being
 of senior citizens, has been paramount to the successful reintroduction of older generations into the heart of
society
Use synonyms
. The efforts that have been made to improve geriatric care with an emphasis on the importance of independence, have created a rise
in capable
(followed by 'of') lacking capacity or ability
incapable
 and healthy elderly citizens. What
this
Linking Words
 investment
does is generate
Suggestion
generates
 a feedback loop where an empowered and fit aging population is able to utilise their most valuable asset, time, in order to actively participate in and benefit
society
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, it’s essential to remember that the over 65s represent more than 20% of the population. A large portion of the populace that, if left redundant can be a burden on the rest of
society
Use synonyms
. Older people, more often than not, have disposable income more substantial than younger people and therefor their purchasing power is valuable. That’s why having senior citizens who are happy and healthy increases the chances of them buying services and products, which
subsequently
Linking Words
 positively impact the economy. There are many other ways in which the over 65s can enhance their local communities. One way is by bringing their veteran experiences to younger generations in different sectors like education.
Finally
Linking Words
, the value that older people impart on the rest of the population is substantial and should always be appreciated and sought after.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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