The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extant do you agree or disagree with this statement?
A huge number of research in different subjects has occurred from a long time ago up to now, so
according to
some, it could be better if scientists mostly effort to enhance the quality of human lives
. In my opinion, I agree that scientific research should focus on the improvement of people's well-being and the rapidness of their activities.
To begin
with, I strongly believe that the most essential purposes of investments and discoveries must concentrate on human health and life expectancy. Take for example
medicine, plenty of explorations have been done to find some reliable treatments for a variety range of illnesses. Researchers in this
field, also
, spend a lot of time detecting suitable vaccines to survive. Another point to consider is that there have been several studies in the technology scope which have led to doing activities more quickly and efficiently. What this
means is that a large number of researchers and inventors try to develop more facilitated equipment and machines to better people's lives
.
Despite this
, some people argue that some scientific experiments have been done to recognize the universe more carefully. For example
, studying space, other galaxies and planets focuses on understanding the beginning moment called the Big Bang. However
, in my opinion, the major goals of a large number of studies which have been occured to identify the world are related to mankind's lives
. In other words
, space is discovered accurately due to
finding the ability of life in the other parts of the universe.
In conclusion, although
science has several goals, the most vital aim is to prevent mankind from dangerous illnesses, to improve the quality of their lives
and to find alternative habitats all over the cosmos.Submitted by atefeh.rashidi2022 on
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coherence cohesion
The essay is mostly structured in a logical way. However, clearer and more distinct paragraphing with topic sentences to introduce each main idea would improve readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but the thesis statement could be clearer in both. The intro should articulate the opinion more distinctly, while the conclusion should reiterate it more forcefully.
coherence cohesion
While main points are presented and supported, they could be enhanced with more detailed examples and a more thorough exploration of how science can directly improve human life.
task achievement
The response addresses the task, but you could achieve a higher band by expanding the range of ideas considering both sides of the argument more fully before concluding. Try to ensure all parts of the task prompt are addressed equally.
task achievement
The ideas presented are clear, but you would benefit from providing more comprehensive explanations and exploring the counterarguments in greater depth to demonstrate a nuanced understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Relevant examples are provided, yet they lack specificity. To improve, draw on particular studies or statistics that offer concrete illustrations of science improving lives or how research aims at broader understanding lead back to human benefits.