IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

most artists earn low salaries and should there receive funding from the government in order for them to continue with their work

#artists #salaries #government #work
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ne
Suggestion
In
a
rly all the artists c
Accept comma addition
conclusion, government
an get sm
all a
Suggestion
spend
mount o
f wag
in a wise manner
wisely
es to th
eir artworks so their
Suggestion
than somewhere else
are decided to get some
money
Use synonyms
 from
government
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 but i'm totally disagree to
this
Linking Words
 statement because some artists can get well paid by some organization to their workks so in my point off view the governement should spent
money
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 to somewhere else
instead
Linking Words
 of give to artists firslty thiss essay will be discussed about the
government
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 should spent their finance to social works
such
Linking Words
 as build road
system
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 for village side and education
system
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 and health care
system
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 rather than to spent in artists
secondly
Linking Words
government
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 can introduce some competition to earn some more
money
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 in artworks and
also
Linking Words
 some professional artists get good salary to their works using social networking in detail the
government
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 should drained their
money
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 to health care center which is have less equipment to treat people
then
Linking Words
government
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 want to spend theor finance in education field
also
Linking Words
 because nowadays people have so many problems in health so they need good medicine and equipment to recover from those kind of problems and some people are lived in rural area so they must want good machine and good traavelling
system
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 for an exmple on of my friend pastaways why because he lived in some village side so they dont have much facilities to help him so
government
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 want to give some
money
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 to develop their facilities and education
system
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 to youngstart but i'm not arguing that
government
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 want give
money
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 to artists because some kind of artists can get more
money
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 because their artwork was more significant and adorable like picasso because his painting was selling upto 2 to 3 laks so it depents on their hardwork so artists can get lots of
money
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 based on their works eventually
government
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 will introduce event to encourage artists and givesome small amount of
money
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 to those artists so they can comeup with new idea so they can aslo sell their artworks to thousand dolloars in world wide market in conclusion
government
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 want to spent
money
Use synonyms
 wisly rather than to somewhere else

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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