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Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people argue that arts, such as paintings and music, are a waste of money and the government should spend this money on other public services. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #arts #paintings #music #waste #money #government #services
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Aside
from
Suggestion
for
 government expenses for public services like health, it is imperative that governments spending their resources for the preservation of arts since it has a permanent significance for mirroring the
country
Use synonyms
's culture and I completely oppose
this
Linking Words
 mentality to cut all their expenses on
arts
Suggestion
the arts
. In my opinion the government's budget should spend for both because of their vital role.
First
Linking Words
 and foremost, social infrastructure as a per the situations need to augment that should include arts because of their active role in depicting and documenting the shape of countries' cultures.
ancient
belonging to times long past especially of the historical period before the fall of the Western Roman Empire
Ancient
 arts maintain historical information
of
Suggestion
about
 the
country
Use synonyms
 and their people should be aware of them that the cost of maintenance is undertaken by the authorities. In Iran, most of the architectures represent sector of
this
Linking Words
Use synonyms
country
Suggestion
country's
 hoary
traditions
Suggestion
tradition
 as can mention the mosques.
Linking Words
Furthermore as
Accept comma addition
Furthermore, as
 spending money on
arts
Suggestion
the arts
 is a kind of respect for a
country
Use synonyms
's history and
next
Linking Words
 generations attempt to keep it as much as better.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
arts
Suggestion
the arts
 are good entertainment for people from all walks of life that does not only teach them more things but
also
Linking Words
 increase their historical information.
Also
Linking Words
, arts include movies, crafts, museums that can consider as
hobby
Suggestion
a hobby
 and people in their spare time make a decision to go to these places which in turn can be useful. To sum up, government investment should in
direction
Suggestion
a direction
 to solve art's problem and thrive it even authorities allocate more budget that it is beneficial for their
country
Use synonyms
 aspect of
financial
Suggestion
finance
.
Submitted by z.abbaspour1992 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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