IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think that paying taxes is their only duty, while others believe that we have more responsibilities towards our society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is thought by some that the submission of tax returns to the
government
Use synonyms
 is the only obligation to be fulfilled on their part,
while
Linking Words
 others believe that there are other essential duties to be carried out by the members of a
society
Use synonyms
. In my opinion, I believe that revenue generated by
giving
Verb problem
paying
show examples
taxes
Use synonyms
 is important for a prosperous
society
Use synonyms
, but our moral responsibilities in a
society
Use synonyms
 are equally essential. On the one hand, tax submission is considered a sole primary responsibility by some
people
Use synonyms
 as they believe that it can generate enough funds for the
government
Use synonyms
 to invest in the betterment of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
.
In other words
Linking Words
, a prosperous
society
Use synonyms
 requires adequate infrastructure including roads, hospitals and educational institutes which can only be completed by a
government
Use synonyms
 after collecting the money from the
people
Use synonyms
 in the form of
taxes
Use synonyms
.
Hence
Linking Words
, the best a person can do is to provide the
government
Use synonyms
, the due share of taxation and the rest is up to the authorities to make full use of it for the betterment of the
people
Use synonyms
. It is
further
Linking Words
 proven by the fact that countries with better tax returns are more prosperous than the ones having a poor collection of
taxes
Use synonyms
 by the general public. It is,
thus
Linking Words
, clear why many consider depositing
taxes
Use synonyms
 as their only duty and leave the rest to the
government
Use synonyms
 authorities.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, others are of the opinion that there are other important tasks to be carried
by
Change preposition
out by
show examples
 citizens rather than just
deposition
Correct article usage
the deposition
show examples
 of
taxes
Use synonyms
. One important duty is to keep the morality of a
society
Use synonyms
 alive and healthy.
This
Linking Words
 includes keeping up the moral values of a
society
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as maintaining cleanliness, adequate disposal of wastes and protecting
natural
Add an article
the natural
show examples
 environment. Because, governments can build facilities for us by utilizing our
taxes
Use synonyms
, but it is for us to use and maintain them adequately.
Moreover
Linking Words
, senior members of a
society
Use synonyms
 have the important task of teaching youngsters the
mannerism
Fix the agreement mistake
mannerisms
show examples
 to be adopted for a harmonious
society
Use synonyms
 and
similarly
Linking Words
 younger generation is bound to be respectful to elders. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 may vary in their opinion about the most important duty in a
society
Use synonyms
, I believe that
taxes
Use synonyms
 to be paid are essential provided moral duties are
also
Linking Words
 being fulfilled.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your introduction presents both sides of the argument well, but it can be slightly more concise to enhance clarity.
task achievement
The conclusions capture your opinion adequately, but consider adding a more impactful statement to emphasize your stance.
coherence cohesion
The flow of ideas is generally good, but consider using more cohesive devices (like 'Furthermore' or 'Nevertheless') to enhance the links between your points.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph contains a clear main idea, but varying your sentence structure could improve readability and engagement.
content
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and presents a balanced view of both sides of the argument.
content
You have used relevant examples to support your points about the responsibilities of citizens, which strengthens your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental duty
  • public services
  • infrastructure
  • social welfare
  • economic stability
  • legal consequences
  • volunteering
  • community service
  • societal well-being
  • donation
  • charities
  • social issues
  • active participation
  • democracy
  • civil society
  • healthy society
  • balancing
  • well-functioning society
What to do next:
Look at other essays: