IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that schools have to be more entertaining, while others think that their sole purpose is to educate. Which do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

#people #schools #purpose #support
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Thanks to the advent of social media, people are now better able to stay connected to their friends and family. They can even follow celebrities to
such
Linking Words
 an extent which was not previously possible.
However
Linking Words
, the usage of social media has its risks. As people of all ages have access to it and use it in their daily life, it has become a major risk for children as they can be exposed to adult content which may trigger violent behaviour in them. The children are
also
Linking Words
 vulnerable to cyber exploitation as they may not know the true identity or motive of the person they are interacting with online. Even when children are talking to someone they know, social media can still pose a lot of other threats. Cyber bullying is frequently reported in the news and occurs on social media among children.
This
Linking Words
 is very problematic as it means that children can be bullied even when they at their home. Social media can be problematic for adults, too. Many people are comfortable posting personal views and opinions and other stuff on social media that they wouldn’t normally share in real life.
This
Linking Words
 can indirectly cause a bad impression on other people, and if employers judge the nature of the content prospective employees post on social media to be inappropriate, it can affect their chances of attaining or keeping jobs.
This
Linking Words
 posted information can
also
Linking Words
 be used to track adult people and to know their whereabouts, which enables the anti-social elements to take advantage and stalk the people and blackmail them to get their bidding done. In conclusion, people have to be aware of the risks of using social media, and careful enough to post only minimal, risk free and respectable content. Only
then
Linking Words
 the advantages of social media will outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by lovnish304 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: