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Writing Samples
Band 7

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do the advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

#technologies #children #time #outweigh
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Nowadays, the changes on the way how children spend their leisure
time
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 due to the influences of novel technological developments has been receiving a great deal of public attention.
Although
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,
this
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 trend is not without disadvantages, the upsides will justify these. On the one hand, there are a number of major drawbacks when children spend too much
time
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 playing with technological devices.
First
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, since children devote a large amount of their
time
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 to video games or screen
time
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 activities, they would have an adverse impact on their health. In fact, these games make them more likely to suffer from various health problems
such
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 as eye strain, short-sightedness or obesity, which leads to low academic achievement, self-distrust, and other similar issues.
Second
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, by spending more
time
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 on online entertainment activities, present
time
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 kids are likely to allocate less
time
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 for other social activities. They tend to play electronic games or browse the Internet
instead
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 of hanging out with their peers, and
this
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 would lead to social isolation which seriously affects their later lives.
On the other hand
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, I believe that the benefits are more significant than
such
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 disadvantages.
Firstly
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, new technologies plays an important role in supporting kids enrich their knowledge and learn a wide range of valuable skills.
For example
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, today’s children could simply access more information about animals and their natural habitats by watching discovery channel on their electronic devices, which helps promote their environmental consciousness.
Second
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, if hi-tech gadgets are effectively used for positive purposes, they could stimulate children's creativity and imagination.
This
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 means that, new era kids would easily learn to conduct simple chemical or physical experiments by watching educational programmes like Minute Earth or Best of science, which makes them more eager to learn and discover new things. In conclusion, I would argue that the appearance of new technological improvements brings more benefits than drawbacks.
Submitted by nvduyen1225 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • new technologies
  • children
  • free time
  • access
  • educational resources
  • information
  • development
  • key skills
  • enhancing
  • creativity
  • imagination
  • opportunity
  • connect
  • convenience
  • flexibility
  • lack
  • physical activity
  • potential
  • health issues
  • impact
  • social
  • emotional development
  • exposure
  • inappropriate content
  • addiction
  • dependency
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