Playing too many video games can lead to decreased physical activity and social interaction, which can have negative effects on overall health. Do you agree or disagree?

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Some people opine that

children

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who spend too much

time

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playing

video

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games

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might have a negative impact on their

overall

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health. Individually,

this

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writer firmly believes that it can affect their cooperation with society and physical fitness.

This

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essay will address the reasons for my views as follows. It should be understood that playing too many

games

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on electronic devices might significantly decrease communication with others in real life.

This

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is because when the younger overreliance on smartphones or computers for entertainment can lead to social isolation and dependency among youth.

Furthermore

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, excessive screen

time

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may reduce face-to-face interaction

due to

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the game world makes gamers have less contact with their family or people around them and discourages practical experience. Take Vietnam for an example,

children

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in the 10-15 age group were addicted to playing

video

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games

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thus

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, there are many cases showing that the younger have less communication with the real world and enjoy the in-game world more.

Therefore

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children

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might have less social interaction if they spend too much

time

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playing

video

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games

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. It is evident that excessive use of electronic devices can lead to physical energy, especially eye strain. To be more particular,

children

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who spend over 180 minutes playing with electronic devices per day can experience myopia which makes individuals have difficulty seeing and recording distant image details. The main reason is that the blue light from the screen may have a negative effect on the youth’s eyesight

such

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as xerophthalmia and visual impairment.

For example

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, most students in secondary schools in Asia wear myopic glasses

due to

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excessive exposure to electronic screens. In conclusion,

this

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writer suggests that offspring should spend less

time

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playing

video

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games

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because of the negative impact on physical well-being and social synergy.

[email protected]Sun Jun 02 2024

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task achievement

Your essay provides a good response to the task and addresses both aspects of the question, which is great. However, to make your argument even stronger, try to elaborate more on the physical and social consequences with additional subpoints or more detailed examples.

coherence cohesion

While your essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion, some sentences could be connected more smoothly using transitional phrases. This would improve the overall flow of the essay and make it easier to follow.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear and logical structure, with a well-defined introduction and conclusion. This helps to frame your argument effectively.

task achievement

You provided relevant and specific examples to support your points, which adds credibility to your argument.

task achievement

Your ideas are clear and comprehensive, making it easy to understand your viewpoint.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

293 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary lifestyle
obesity
poor posture
eye strain
social isolation
communication skills
empathy
mental health issues
addiction
anxiety
depression
cognitive skills
stress relief
balanced view

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Playing too many video games can lead to decreased physical activity and social interaction, which can have negative effects on overall health. Do you agree or disagree?

People eat more processed food than they did in the past. Why is this? What are the effects of this?

In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents who are choosing to educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?

In many professional sports, there is an increase in the number of athletes using banned substances to improve their performance. What are the causes of the phenomenon and what are some of the possible solutions?

As technology advances, traveling to space is likely to become an option for holidaysmakers in the future. What do you think are the advantages and disadvantages of space tourism?

Some people think that the media (newspapers ) have the right to publish details of people's private lives, while other think it should be controlled. discuss both views.