Playing too many video games can lead to decreased physical activity and social interaction, which can have negative effects on overall health. Do you agree or disagree?
Some people opine that
children
who spend too much time
playing video
games
might have a negative impact on their overall
health. Individually, this
writer firmly believes that it can affect their cooperation with society and physical fitness. This
essay will address the reasons for my views as follows.
It should be understood that playing too many games
on electronic devices might significantly decrease communication with others in real life. This
is because when the younger overreliance on smartphones or computers for entertainment can lead to social isolation and dependency among youth. Furthermore
, excessive screen time
may reduce face-to-face interaction due to
the game world makes gamers have less contact with their family or people around them and discourages practical experience. Take Vietnam for an example, children
in the 10-15 age group were addicted to playing video
games
, thus
, there are many cases showing that the younger have less communication with the real world and enjoy the in-game world more. Therefore
, children
might have less social interaction if they spend too much time
playing video
games
.
It is evident that excessive use of electronic devices can lead to physical energy, especially eye strain. To be more particular, children
who spend over 180 minutes playing with electronic devices per day can experience myopia which makes individuals have difficulty seeing and recording distant image details. The main reason is that the blue light from the screen may have a negative effect on the youth’s eyesight such
as xerophthalmia and visual impairment. For example
, most students in secondary schools in Asia wear myopic glasses due to
excessive exposure to electronic screens.
In conclusion, this
writer suggests that offspring should spend less time
playing video
games
because of the negative impact on physical well-being and social synergy.Submitted by [email protected] on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a good response to the task and addresses both aspects of the question, which is great. However, to make your argument even stronger, try to elaborate more on the physical and social consequences with additional subpoints or more detailed examples.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion, some sentences could be connected more smoothly using transitional phrases. This would improve the overall flow of the essay and make it easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, with a well-defined introduction and conclusion. This helps to frame your argument effectively.
task achievement
You provided relevant and specific examples to support your points, which adds credibility to your argument.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear and comprehensive, making it easy to understand your viewpoint.