Parents of obese children should be punished for making them fat. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The parents of children who suffer from obesity should receive punishment for allowing their children to become overweight.
This
Linking Words
essay disagrees with
this
Linking Words
statement because obesity can be caused by genetics and children often eat unhealthy food outside of the home. Parents are not to blame because obesity can be caused by genetics. The DNA
that is
Linking Words
passed from parents to
child
Use synonyms
can trigger a slow metabolism which
resuls
a phenomenon that follows and is caused by some previous phenomenon
results
in the
child
Use synonyms
burning fewer calories than normal. Despite
givng
the act of giving
giving
given
the
child
Use synonyms
a balanced diet or opportunities to do exercise, they may still not be able to maintain a healthy weight, despite the best intentions of their mother and father. A recent study found that 70% of all morbidly obese children
also
Linking Words
have at least one parent who is
also
Linking Words
seriously overweight and more than half have two. Parents are not present when
childern
a young person of either sex
children
consume most of their food.
when
Suggestion
When
childern
a young person of either sex
children
are at school, they eat snacks and have lunch and the adults have no control over their dietary intake during
this
Linking Words
time. A
child
Use synonyms
could consume the vast majority of their calories during these unsupervised periods, without their mother and father's knowledge or permission and much of
this
Linking Words
intake could take the form of junk food. A recent study found that primary school students consume an average of 75% of their daily recommended calorific allowance during school hours. In conclusion, parents should not be sanctioned if their sons or daughters are too heavy because they are unable to supervise their diet for most of the day and genes play a role in determining the weight of a human being.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • obesity
  • genetics
  • socio-economic status
  • nutritional education
  • physical activity programs
  • adverse effects
  • mental health issues
  • responsibility sharing
  • implementation
  • privileged families
  • supportive environment
  • lifestyle changes
  • educational campaigns
What to do next:
Look at other essays: