The table below shows the worldwide market share of the notebook computer market for manufacturers in the years 2006 and 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The table gives information on the
market
share
of notebook
computer manufacturers for two consecutive years, 2006 and 2007.
In both years, HP was clearly the market
leader, selling 31.4% of all notebook
computers in 2006, and slightly more (34%) in 2007. This
is a greater market
share
than its two closest competitors, Dell and Acer, added together.
Dell increased its market
share
from 16.6% in 2006 to 20.2% in 2007. In contrast
, Acer saw its share
of the market
decline slightly from 11.6% to 10.7%.
The other companies listed each had a much smaller share
of the market
. Toshiba’s share
increased from 6.2% in 2006 to 7.3% in 2007, whereas
Lenovo’s decreased slightly from 6.6% to 6.2%. Fujitsu-Siemens’ share
more than halved from 2006 to 2007: from 4.8% of the market
to only 2.3%.
Other notebook
computer manufacturers accounted for 22.8% of the market
in 2006 – more than all the companies mentioned except HP. However
, in 2007 the other companies only made 19.3% of notebook
computer sales – less than both HP and DellSubmitted by x.christine0729 on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words market, share, notebook with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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