Too much money is spending on repairing old buildings instead of knocking down them and building new ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

6.0 / 9

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Introduction

It is true that it costs

enormous amount

Suggestion

an enormous amount

enormous amounts

of money to preserve historical buildings rather than building modern premises.I disagree with

this

Linking Words

statement to

large extent

Suggestion

a large extent

and I think that it is worthwhile to restore ancient monuments.

Body paragraph 1

To begin

Linking Words

with the benefits of erecting new buildings as compared to protect old ones.

Firstly

Linking Words

, modern premises will be built according to the requirements of modern people and it will be comfortable for them to use for any purpose.

For instance

Linking Words

, school premise needs latest technology for modern education as nowadays technological gadgets are required to educate students so schools are built according to requirement of students and teachers so latest equipments can be installed and used.

Secondly

Linking Words

, modern buildings would be more secure and long lasting as these places are made with latest material and

also

Linking Words

latest equipments are installed for safety purposes like sound proof doors, gadgets to withstand with earthquake or storm.

However

Linking Words

Accept space

old monument may become the cause of

threat

Suggestion

the threat

for

Suggestion

human life as some historical building

are

Suggestion

on extinction and these buildings should be demolished.

Body paragraph 2

Apart from

this

Linking Words

, there are many reasons why ancient building should be restored.As historical places are the identity and heritage of any country or city.If these

building

Suggestion

buildings

are demolished

then

Linking Words

history and culture of that region would die out and people cannot come to know about the past of

people

Suggestion

the people

and

region

Suggestion

regions

the region

.By preserving these building individuals would feel connected to their ancestors and

also

Linking Words

theses buildings apprise new generation about the life of past people and the culture of that region.

Moreover

Linking Words

, historical monuments can bring the tourism in a particular city and government can make it

source

Suggestion

a source

for

Suggestion

revenue.

For example

Linking Words

, more

touristors

someone who travels for pleasure

tourists

would visit these buildings and more they would spend

Accept space

thus

Linking Words

it leads to

development

Suggestion

the development

of that city and country as it would increase job opportunities and would encourage people to start

small business

Suggestion

a small business

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

authorities

Suggestion

the authorities

would make improvements to

road system

Suggestion

the road system

and transportations.Therefor, it is win-win situations for both individuals and government.

Conclusion

In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

there are many advantages

Suggestion

constructing new buildings, to restore ancient monuments is more beneficial.

Feb 19, 2020

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

6.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

347 words

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Too much money is spending on repairing old buildings instead of knocking down them and building new ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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