Nowadays people get married and have their kids in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Do you agree or disagree that this trend will benefit society?

Evidence suggests that, people, these days, get married and have their children in older ages. I completely agree with
this
statement due to the couple of reasons I will discuss with elaboration.
To begin
with, people can be m
ore awareness
Suggestion
more aware
in the period of thirties rather than in younger ages because they know u
ps
Suggestion
the ups
and downs of lifestyle. Positive and negative of lifestyle if people do not consider them and c
areless
Suggestion
care
care less
caring
about these perennial problems, people will have severe problems and will f
ace
become less clearly visible or distinguishable; disappear gradually or seemingly
fade
with divorcing. Simply put, people have been w
ritten
Suggestion
writing
their plans, goals and aims for more than years because they had a lot of time to concentrate on their schedule to have a better lifespan. Another compelling r
easons
Suggestion
reason
might be psychologist which causes people to be m
ore conscience
Suggestion
more conscientious
and they will show b
etter way
Suggestion
a better way
for people t
o thought
Suggestion
think
about their lives.
Although
people rely on scientists, so confide to them shape their personality at older ages. To put it differently, improving their personality stems from make better decision for all l
ives.
Suggestion
life
So, better decision occurs in later ages when people become more mature. Yet, people c
an be mature
Suggestion
can mature
in early a
ges but
Accept comma addition
ages, but
they have less experience and lack of opportunity to get married these two have a significant key o
n
Suggestion
in
p
eople
Suggestion
peoples'
peoples
lives. Less opportunity to get married causes they d
o not
Accept comma addition
do, not
how to behave with people who wants to propose. s
o
to a very great extent or degree
So
they have less experience to face with getting married and growing children. In the same vein, people must be having professional knowledge and to gain a competitive edge of growing children. In conclusion, for the aforementioned a
bove I
Accept comma addition
above, I
totally agree that get married and have their kids must be useful and effective in the age of thirties while in younger a
ges they
Accept comma addition
ages, they
do not have b
etter experience
Suggestion
a better experience
for both upbringings their children and have b
etter life
Suggestion
a better life
better lives
with their spouse. In fact, psychologists have a key role o
n
Suggestion
in
one’s life.
Submitted by Niu on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial stability
  • emotional maturity
  • secure upbringing
  • career prospects
  • education and career development
  • lifetime earnings
  • job satisfaction
  • health outcomes
  • demographic shift
  • population growth
  • ageing population
  • parental preparedness
  • responsibilities of parenting
  • modern healthcare
  • capable of having healthy pregnancies
  • balancing population growth
  • establish careers
  • save money
  • healthier relationships
  • better parenting
What to do next:
Look at other essays: