IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Tourism is becoming increasingly important as a source of revenue to many countries, but its disadvantages should not be overlooked. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is undeniable that
tourism
Use synonyms
 often considered as a vital factor in raising a
country
Use synonyms
’s revenue. While
this
Linking Words
 approach might be crucial for the
economy
Use synonyms
, I would argue that it has some drawbacks that should be taken into consideration up to a point.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
tourism
Use synonyms
 plays an essential role in maintaining a
country
Use synonyms
’s
economy
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is because the increasing number of tourists who visit a
country
Use synonyms
 for a vacation may
rise
raise the level or amount of something
raise
 its revenues, and
this
Linking Words
 is may be resulted in lowering the rates of unemployment.
For instance
Linking Words
, Singapore, was considered as a poor
country
Use synonyms
 in the
last
Linking Words
 four decades
until
Suggestion
by
 its government planned to overcome the poverty by encouraging tourists to visit Singapore.
As a result
Linking Words
, the
economy
Use synonyms
 of Singapore is now one of the best economies in the world as it is as well the most
favorable
encouraging or approving or pleasing
favourable
 attraction for honeymooners.
However
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
tourism
Use synonyms
 usually has a significant role in raising revenues, it has some minor drawbacks. Brazil,
for example
Linking Words
, had held the world cup in the 2018. While it has a powerful
economy
Use synonyms
, it is unfortunately well-known for thefts.
In other words
Linking Words
, the vast majority of people in Brazil suffer from crimes.
This
Linking Words
 is why many tourists opt not to travel to Brazil due to highly unlikely robberies that could occur.
Consequently
Linking Words
, the Brazilian
economy
Use synonyms
 is now suffering from recession as many investors left the
country
Use synonyms
 due to unsafe conditions. In conclusion, despite the tremendous amount that a
country
Use synonyms
 can generate from
tourism
Use synonyms
, I believe that it has some drawbacks that should be overcome by government.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: