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Writing Samples
Band 6

All over the world, societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem affects both children and adults. What are the reasons for this rise in obesity? How could it be tackled?

#world #societies #obesity #children #adults #rise
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Obesity is a pressing issue that many countries are experiencing. The ubiquitous presence of fast-
food
Use synonyms
 chain restaurants, serving high-calorie meals loaded with fats and sodium, and neglecting to cook wholesome meals at home are among the underlying causes, but there are possible ways of curbing
this
Linking Words
 unhealthy trend. One of the leading causes of
the high
Suggestion
the highest
 obesity rate is the high intake of junk
food
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,
such
Linking Words
 as hamburgers, chips, or fried chicken. Many people prefer takeaway meals containing a high content of salt and fat rather than healthy meals at home because of their convenience.
For instance
Linking Words
, in the UK, the sales of junk
food
Use synonyms
 have increased over the
last
Linking Words
 few years because it is simple and easy to place online orders. Another cause of obesity is attributed to people’s sedentary lifestyle.
Instead
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 of playing outdoor sports, people would prefer to watch their
favorite
something regarded with special favor or liking
favourite
 movies on TV or to play video games on the Internet while munching chips.
This
Linking Words
 often results in the empty calories being transformed into fat. There are a couple of tactics that the government could use to promote healthy habits. One tactic is for the government to put a tax on unhealthy
food
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 would encourage consumers to abstain from junk
food
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 and start preparing
food
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 at home. The compounding costs of tax on top of the
food
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 itself would make people turn to alternatives,
such
Linking Words
 as home-cooked
food
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. Another tactic is the government should ban the advertising of unhealthy
food
Use synonyms
 on the mass media,
such
Linking Words
 as TV and the Internet. As children have not fully developed their rational judgments, they could not resist the urge to buy these products when stumbling upon the appealing images of them. In conclusion, I am convinced that the issue of obesity is attributed to a sedentary life and the convenience of buying fast
food
Use synonyms
, and hopefully, some tactics,
such
Linking Words
 as a tax and prohibition on advertising fast
food
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, would lead people to embrace healthy lifestyles.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Obesity
  • Overweight
  • Epidemic
  • Sedentary
  • Processed food
  • Fast food
  • Nutritional education
  • Awareness
  • Stress
  • Emotional eating
  • Genetic factors
  • Access
  • Healthy food options
  • Marketing
  • Urbanization
  • Lifestyles
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