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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

some think the best way to motivate and encourage people to work hard is to pay them based on how much they produce and sell to what extend do you agree or disagree?

#think #people #work
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One of the responsibilities of a manager is to continuously motivate his employees to increase their performance.
Although
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, it is believed that the most effective way to boost hired people energy is paying them depending on the level of the productions and sales.
However
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, I strongly disagree with the mentioned opinion and I do not think that it will be effective in encouraging workers to do their best. The performance in numerous cases cannot be qualified in term of selling and outcome. A dentist’s job,
for example
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 is to do oral examination of the patients, assess the level of caries and restore teeth. None of which involves producing or selling goods. In
this
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 case, it is the satisfaction of his patients with regard of his skills
such
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 as infection control or using high quality materials will decide how successful the dentist has been.
Furthermore
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, the abilities of many workers are greatly affected by external factors
that is
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 beyond their control, economy, state, unexpected political development and extreme weather condition can all have significant impact on how much an employee can produce or sell. Too much snowing in winter,
for example
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, might prevent workers from going to their jobs without them being responsible for that.
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Thus basing
Accept comma addition
Thus, basing
 on wages for sale and production rate will actively draw their interest toward the situation. In conclusion, though on of the ways that bosses do trend their hired skills is to provide them salaries regarding to the rate of sales and productions. Even, I think
such
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 decision is impossible and unfair in most cases,
instead
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 they should find a more diverse set of performance_indicators including customer satisfaction and punctuality.
Submitted by shanya.faraidoon.95 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • motivate
  • encourage
  • productivity
  • performance-based pay
  • objective assessment
  • collaboration
  • creativity
  • innovation
  • stress
  • burnout
  • job satisfaction
  • compensation strategy
  • quantify
  • supportive work environment
  • professional development
  • recognition programs
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