Nowadays celebrities are mainly famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree and disagree?

It is commonly believed that famous people, who are more well known for their luxury lifestyle and wealth than the achievement of their career, can be negative influences to children. In my opinion, I agree that celebrities can be seen as a bad role model for young people;
however
, they are some good famous people that
also
inspire young people to be successful in
life
according to their wealth and glamorous
life
. According to the advanced development of technology, children can more easily access media in multiple channels, namely mobile phone or television, which help widely expand the stories and show the leisure
life
of famous people to them, more than before. Nowadays, those media
such
as Instragram and Facebook can show the detail of the personal
life
of famous people that influence young people in negative ways.
For example
, Instragram can broadcast the live video of celebrities who spend extravagant money on unnecessary goods.
This
kind of behaviour sets a bad example for those children for spending their parents’ income on expensive stuff.
However
, some celebrities can
also
be a good role model for adolescent due to their achievement.
For instance
, Liza, a famous Thai singer in Korea girl group brand, started chasing her dream since she was fifteen years old. She has the largest number of followers in the Instragram, most of whom are children in Thailand, according to her high-end fashion and glamorous
life
.
In addition
, to have luxury lifestyle, Liza explained to her followers that she are required to work hard for ten years before
finally
successful in her career as a popular singer.
Furthermore
, Liza
also
well known for her humble and generous for donating a large amount of money to school in the rural area in Thailand, which results in larger public attention for a problem in Thai education for young people in a suburban area.
Therefore
,
this
kind of example inspires young people in Thailand to work hard for their goal and contribute a positive impact to their country. In conclusion,
although
celebrities can be seen as a negative influence for their luxurious lifestyle, I agree that some famous people can be a positive effect on young people to follow and work hard to be successful in their career.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • glamour
  • wealth
  • achievements
  • portrayed
  • overshadow
  • influenced
  • lifestyles
  • unrealistic
  • expectations
  • values
  • promoting
  • hard work
  • perseverance
  • inspire
  • positive impact
What to do next:
Look at other essays: