Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #teenagers #work #money #lessons #shouldn #sacrifice #rest #activities

Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn

money

. They believe, in

this

way, they will learn additional skills other than studies and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their childhood

life

in working while they are still studying. In my opinion, availing a part-time job during once educational

life

could make them a disciplined person, but

this

work-

life

balance may

also

stimulate the stress level of the students. On the one hand, most of the teenagers started to involve themselves in some works in their free time.

Additionally

, some started to earn

money

through

this

For example

, once the study time is over, during their leisure hours, they are trying to prove themselves to the outside world by struggling to get a work to do and for

this

plethora of efforts are probably taken from the students side.

On the other hand

, contradicting, though all these jobs have their advantages in enhancing the personal character and independence of an individual,

however

this

is leading them to sacrifice the memorable and enjoyable childhood days in gaining

money

. In consequence, some get stressed out and are

finally

exhausted since they are missing their whole

life

running for the

money

and forgetting the extracurricular activities

such

as sports, swimming and so on.

For instance

, a person may be talented in gaining some additional knowledge in the curriculum, but he might not be able to succeed, which is because of other additional responsibilities which will be obviously running in their mind. To conclude,

Although

we are getting a chance to know about society and get disciplined by opting for a part-time job,

this

is anyway creating more pressure for an individual student.

Hence

, it is better to avoid working in part-time jobs, still, we complete our student

life

properly with good grades. Because I believe, being a part of an organization will definitely pull a student down in his educational

life

Thu Feb 27 2020

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

323 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal.some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Disscuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting universuty studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Some people think that the main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers, rather to benefit them as individual. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest?