Gaming has become a popular e-sport and has been included in some regional and international sports events. Some people advocate this, claiming that there is almost no risk of injury with e-sports; others are worried that the increasing popularity of competitive gaming tournaments may exacerbate video game addiction among young people.

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Gaming is becoming a matter of concern among people as it is overwhelmingly popular in

this

digital era.

As a result

, playing games is now considered as

e-sport

including several regional and international sport events. While

e-sport

is believed to minimize the risk of injury, I suppose that it may encourage more youngsters to be involved in gaming addiction. On the one hand, there are several reasons why video game is beneficial to players.

Firstly

, the physical damages in the conventional sports will be vanished when engaging in

e-sport

This

is due to the fact that gaming is an indoor activity, which only requires the skills of player in controlling by keyboards and mouse.

As a result

, the dangers in physical injury might be reduced for the participants and the viewers.

Furthermore

, gaming may help children to develop some essential skills

such

as cooperation, which are often felt to be an excellent preparation for their adulthood;

therefore

, the discrimination between gaming tournaments and others should be deleted as they all have the positives for players.

On the other hand

, a few potential drawbacks of playing games can jeopardize the youth.

First

and foremost, the games are said to be extremely addictive to youngsters, meaning that the development of

this

kind of entertainment will distract them from their academic career and affect badly to their performance at school.

Moreover

, young people with a tremendous amount of time on gaming will have a sedentary lifestyle, which is the main cause of the rise in obesity. Henceforth, they will suffer from some cardiovascular diseases and heart attacks. In conclusion, while it can be argued that game tournaments bring various merits to the players, I think the detrimental effects of

this

e-sport

can ruin the physical health and academic performance of young people.

Submitted by toithichconsole on Fri Feb 28 2020

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

299 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

People who cause their own illnesses through unhealthy lifestyles and poor diets should have to pay more for health care. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

The youth in many countries are unemployed and unskilled, while at the same time, the military services are in need of people. Compulsory military service is beneficial and necessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many societies in the world, the population is ageing rapidly and this is leading to an unsustainable increase in the cost of public healthcare. A nation’s population should pay for their healthcare provision in the future. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Topic: Some people think that the best way to improve road safety is reducing the amount of maximum speed of vehicles. Others think that other ways exist. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays people waste a lot of food that was bought from shops and restaurants. Why do you think people waste food? What can be done to reduce the amount of food they throw away?