[Переслано от Асадбек] In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message

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It is believed by many cultures that

children

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can accomplish anything if they believe and work hard.

While

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there are benefits to that belief, there are

also

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drawbacks. Every child would expect their

parents

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’ unconditional support and love to push them to achieve their goals. That being said, many

parents

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persuade their

children

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to achieve anything they want without question.

Parents

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advocating for their

children

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also

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increase their determination, abilities, and confidence.

Consequently

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, ambition and hard work may lead to their goals.

For instance

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, the world-famous football player Messi’s mother was the only one who pushed Messi to achieve his goals. No one believed him except his family, and that’s what made him think of himself.

However

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children

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’s imaginations are extremely powerful and unlimited at their age since they are still in the process of differentiating between reality and the fantasy world.

Therefore

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, it could be hard for them to understand what they can realistically achieve in their life.

This

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matter may create unrealistic expectations,

such

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as inadequate

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children

Correct quantifier usage

number of children

show examples

willing to become a football player or

singer

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singers

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or even consider becoming an astronaut easily.

Although

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they are not successful enough or their capacity is limited

with

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show examples

something else,

children

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would expect

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

unconditional support from their

parents

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since they think they could be successful in anything they want.

Additionally

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, their failures and hard work with unrealistic expectations could demotivate them, disappoint them, and ruin their self-esteem and confidence. In conclusion, society tells

children

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they can be successful at anything they want, and

this

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is healthy to some extent.

Children

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should be taught to differentiate between realistic and unrealistic by their

parents

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so there will not be detrimental results in the future.

mvl Tue Apr 01 2025

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Task Achievement

While you have a good introduction and conclusion, refining your thesis statement to directly address the advantages and disadvantages could strengthen your position.

Coherence and Cohesion

Try to ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that directly connects to the main point you are making, which will improve the flow of your ideas.

Task Achievement

Consider providing more examples or elaborating on the potential downsides to balance the essay’s argumentation further, as this could enhance clarity and depth.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay presents a clear viewpoint and balances advantages and disadvantages effectively, showing a good understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

281 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

achieve
try hard
positive mindset
self-belief
motivates
ambitious goals
resilience
determination
confidence
self-esteem
growth mindset
unrealistic expectations
disappointment
failure
effort
hard work
seek support
individual differences
abilities
capabilities

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[Переслано от Асадбек] In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message

Your opinion

Fresh water reserves are becoming less worldwide. What are the reasons for this? What are the solutions that can be done by countries and individuals?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case?.Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience,

Students should choose a university major that prepares them for high-paying careers. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion.