IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Each year, the crime rate increases. What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?

#year #crime #rate #increases #rise #activity
We are living in the most fascinating world where everything changes drastically fast. As there are lots of positive things have developed which can enhance the quality of human life while on the darker side the most serious issue is
crime
. Nowadays, every age group of people is involved in criminal activities due to the different reasons. Nowadays, the government has spent lots of money to identify and punish of criminal activities. The reasons behind the crimes are countless but the most common reasons are drugs, alcohol, social problems and poverty. To resolve the issues government can focus on either hard punishment or develop employment opportunities. One of the main causes of criminality is the use, sale and dealing of narcotics.
For example
, sales of drugs are organised by armed criminal gangs who illegally traffic drugs using children and control their business with extreme violence. In
such
 cases tougher punishment is the best resolution. In some cases poverty is
also
 a major factor behind a
crime
 because unskilled jobs pay a little and daily living expenses are high, so for survival they have easily diverted to criminal activities.
Crime
 can be dealt with not only strict criminal laws, but some of the other way may be to deal with the social causes. Increasing job opportunities in poor areas can improve the living standards which will ultimately helpful to afford daily expanses, housing and educations. In conclusion,
crime
 is a major issue, but cracking down it with a harsh penal system is not the only way. These problems can be solved through the government providing jobs and funding, which should raise living standards and dramatically reduce
crime
 levels.
Submitted by pratikoza25 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: