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Band 5.5

The prevention on health problems and illness is more important than treatment and medicine. Government funding should reflect this. To what extent do you agree?

#prevention #health #illness #treatment #medicine #government
Talking about healthy, working to prevent illnesses and other problems of the same kind should be taken, by the government, more seriously than treatment and medicine, and it should manage its money according to
this
 idea.
Therefore
, I think that prevention and treatment should be placed at the same level. Obviously, to inform people about what they should do, in order to lower the possibilities to get sick in the future, it is something important to invest in.
This
 is why, in my opinion, improving
this
 instrument we have, could help a lot of people to avoid making health mistakes.
Therefore
, I am convicted that it is not the only subject we have to focus on. Healing illnesses it is
also
 an important point to consider, especially to give to everyone the chance to fight his disease. In fact, giving more funds to the prevention campaign, means having less money to use on developing new medicines and new treatments that may save a lot of lives. In addiction, I don't think that to inform people is necessary
such
 a richness. It will be enough to insert some of these basic rules during school lessons, into the advertisement on the television, or on the food packaging as well. To sum up, acting before is fundamental, but it is
also
 important not to let sick people to give up.
Submitted by silvia.motta97 on

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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