Some people believe that the government should spend money to create more art such as paintings and statues in cities to make them a better place to live to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #government #money #art #paintings #statues #cities #place

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It is argued, that the government should spend more budget on public art, to make cities a more enjoyable environment to live in, I partially agree with

this

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opinion, since; I believe paintings, sculptures, live music, performances and other forms of crafts, should be in service of society to be effective.

Firstly

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, these days, the idea that artworks only belong to their creators and a special class is quite popular. As, they believe that normal people cannot understand the meaning of their works, and they would not appreciate it.

Therefore

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, to consume art, one could only buy tickets and spend a fortune to go to galleries museums

Remove the comma

apply

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and

theaters

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theatres

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On the other hand

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, artists' work could be extremely helpful in developing society’s culture.

As well as

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, simply beautifying the streets, it could be

also

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a highly efficient way to inform people about various issues,

for instance

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, raise awareness about equality and human rights, global warming, and several more matters. Taking everything into consideration, the government mostly ought to break the wall between artists and other citizens. By, supporting and helping them to bring their creations to the streets.

Thus

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, the most practical way is to finance them, by giving them a generous allocation of money,

besides

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, areas that can be used for presentations.

To conclude

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, art can be capable of creating a better world for everyone. It does not belong to a specific crowd of intellectuals;

moreover

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, it should be accessible to the public, with the consideration and support of the government.

Submitted by Pegahghaderi85 on Tue Feb 20 2024

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Coherence & Cohesion

Work on linking your ideas more cohesively through the use of a wider range of transitional phrases and topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader through your argument more smoothly.

Task Achievement

Enhance your task achievement by providing more detailed and specific examples to support your arguments. Specific examples make your points more convincing and show a deeper understanding of the topic.

Task Achievement

Consider exploring a counter-argument in more depth to show a balanced understanding of the topic. This could involve acknowledging potential drawbacks or limitations of your position before refuting them or reinforcing your own stance.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

252 words

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Some people believe that the government should spend money to create more art such as paintings and statues in cities to make them a better place to live to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important for children’s development as other subjects, so they should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree or disagree?

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Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world Do you think this is a postive or negative development?

Many countries raise fuel prices to deal successfully with problems of traffic and polluon. What effects do you think this move can have? What other measures do you think can be taken to reduce traffic and pollution ?

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