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Band 7

Many people are now opting to provide technology companies with their personal data in exchange for access to software. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #technology #companies #data #exchange #access #software #outweigh
It is argued that more people prefer to share personal information with the Information Technology companies in exchange to access the
software
 application. While sharing sensitive information to technology companies can be a security risk because they are the target of hackers, I believe that the positive benefits far more outweighs the drawback. Providing personal data to the
software
 companies can be dangerous because
this
 can be the target of hackers.
This
 means that sensitive data will be compromised whenever the fraudulent groups hacked the personal account. The most common targets are bank accounts or credit cards, which is the easiest way for hackers to steal money.
That is
 why many people have lost millions of dollars as a consequence of providing sensitive details,
such
 as bank account, to technology companies, which later on hacked.
For instance
, the Central Bank of the Philippines reported in 2019 that hackers steal a huge amount of money from the bank account holders.
However
, I believe the use of
software
 applications provides more advantages than the pressing problem in sharing personal data with
software
 companies. The most significant merit in the use of a
software
 application program is the platform design to process tremendous jobs beyond human capacity. It is highly important to many people as
this
 can increase productivity and efficiency.
As a result
, the majority of people in the world are profoundly dependent on the use of many applications
such
 as Microsoft, Word, Excel, and PowerPoint.
For example
, every individual uses Microsoft Office Applications as primary tools to perform daily work.
Therefore
, accessing
software
 applications is far more outweigh the drawback as it functions great jobs than humans. In conclusion, the tremendous functions of
software
 applications beyond human knowledge far more outweigh the risk of providing personal details to technology companies.
Submitted by caseres.a on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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