It has become very common for people to borrow money. Maby people have credit card, a mortgage and often they buy a car on credit card as well. Is this a good idea or this is too risky? Discuss both views abd give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is quite common nowadays that the majority of the population is taking loans . Some argue that it is dangerous because of getting into more debt

whereas

Linking Words

others argue that , if properly managed it is beneficial . In my opinion, it should be managed

according to

Linking Words

one’s source of

income

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay is expected to discuss both views .

Firstly

Linking Words

, as the critics argue taking huge amounts of loans can lead anyone to more trouble. if

someone

Use synonyms

without a proper and regular

income

Use synonyms

takes a vehicle on instalments , hoping for the improvement of the

business

Use synonyms

they had started . And if the

business

Use synonyms

is not doing good to earn proper returns the problem starts .

As a result

Linking Words

, the repayments will get delayed or stopped adding to the consequences . To illustrate , one of my friends had bought a luxury car on

loan

Use synonyms

on the assumption of improving his

business

Use synonyms

, but he ended up losing his establishment . Because he could not repay his car

loan

Use synonyms

due to

Linking Words

a decline in his

business

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

, if

someone

Use synonyms

with a reliable and regular

income

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of paying the full amount and buying a vehicle , they can utilise that amount for other productive purposes .

For example

Linking Words

someone

Use synonyms

earning around five thousand dollars per month wants to buy a car worth 50000 $ .

Instead

Linking Words

of paying the full amount they can pay 500- or 600-dollars EMI . Meanwhile utilising the money in other productive ways In my opinion, taking a

loan

Use synonyms

is practical if

someone

Use synonyms

has sources to repay it without a break . so that there is no burden of spending huge sums of money at once

To conclude

Linking Words

, as some people argue taking a

loan

Use synonyms

is a dangerous deal ,

as well as

Linking Words

a good idea depending on one’s

income

Use synonyms

status and ability to repay . in my opinion, it should be attempted judiciously

drcamtSun Jul 28 2024

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task achievement

While the essay introduces the topic and discusses both views, ensure you elaborate more on the benefits and risks associated with borrowing money to provide a more balanced argument.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs by using more linking words and connectors to create a seamless reading experience.

task achievement

Proofread for minor grammatical and spelling errors to enhance readability, such as 'maby' to 'maybe', and replace words like 'utilise' with 'utilize' for consistency in spelling.

task achievement

Support the main points with stronger examples and evidence to make the arguments more convincing and relatable.

coherence cohesion

The essay thoroughly discusses both viewpoints on borrowing money and provides a well-structured introduction and conclusion.

task achievement

Your personal example about your friend adds a personal touch to the essay, making it more engaging for readers.

coherence cohesion

The overall structure of the essay is clear, with distinct paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

329 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Economy
Invest
Future planning
Financial flexibility
Immediate access
Unmanageable debt
Financial literacy
Interest rates
Long-term impact
Good debt
Bad debt
Depreciative value
Consumer goods
Budgeting
Repayment plan
Emergency fund
Credit rating
Obtaining credit
Normalize
Advertising
Regulation
Responsible lending
Transparency
Financial agreements

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It has become very common for people to borrow money. Maby people have credit card, a mortgage and often they buy a car on credit card as well. Is this a good idea or this is too risky? Discuss both views abd give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In many societies, there is a growing emphasis on individualism, with people prioritizing their personal goals and desires over collective interests. Is this is a positive or negative development?

Some people believe the purpose of education is to make people useful to society. Others believe it is to prepare them to achieve their ambitions. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, more and more older people who need employment compete with the younger people for the same job. What problem this causes? What are solution?