Many people believe money is a very important factor for achieving happiness. Others, however believe that money has nothing to do with happiness. Discuss both views. and give your opinion.

It is often said that if you want to be happy in
life
, have to earn a myriad of
fund
Fix the agreement mistake
funds
show examples
.
Hence
, there are certain folks who claim that without
money
no
one
could live their
life
free of tension that
considered
Add a missing verb
is considered
show examples
as being happy.
Whereas
, the rest of the individuals think that wealth does not have to do with happiness.
Firstly
,
this
essay will discuss why
people
think that
money
is
the
Correct article usage
a
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must for a happy
life
and
secondly
, why others think that it is
ok to
Correct word choice
okay
show examples
not to have
money
.
Nonetheless
, In my opinion, we do need
money
to survive, but
for
Change preposition
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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happiness,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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depends on the person's thinking or beliefs that how he or she looks at
the
Correct article usage
apply
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things. On the
one
hand, with
money
individual is able to get almost all the needed materials in
life
such
as an excellent quality house,
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
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car and so on. For some
people
, if you have
this
you
considered
Add a missing verb
are considered
show examples
as
Change preposition
apply
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a happy person.
For instance
,
according to
the
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apply
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INDIA's wealthy
people
, 70% of the
people
desire to have
money
to fulfil their daily requirements as without wealth they could not get.
On the other hand
, with
money
,
one
is unable to get a loving family, because
real
Correct article usage
a real
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family is the
one
who
support
Change the verb form
supports
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you during all the ups and downs together and never leaves you alone.
This
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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can not
achieve
Wrong verb form
be achieved
show examples
by just having
money
.
For example
,
according to
the psychology department of the UK research, 60% of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people
considered
as
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apply
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happy who
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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caring and supportive parents and family members like siblings,
grandparents
Correct word choice
and grandparents
show examples
. In conclusion,
money
However
provides an opportunity to obtain a luxurious and
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
life
, but happiness comes when individuals feel satisfied with what they have. Owning to the fact that no
money
Add a verb
money is
money was
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able to get you
Add the particle
to stress
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stress free
Add a hyphen
stress-free
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life
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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only comes with a mature understanding of
life
.
Submitted by drsefalipatel on

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task response
The essay addresses the prompt but lacks clear and developed arguments. Focus on providing stronger and more balanced arguments for each view.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Ensure that the structure clearly introduces the topic and summarizes the main points.
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