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Writing Samples
Band 4

Today, TV channels provide men’s sport shows more than women’s sports shows. Why? Should TV channels give equal time for women’s sport and men’s sport?

#tv #channels #men’s #sport #women’s #sports #time
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In recent years, men’s
sport
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 shows considerably outnumber those of women. There has been an opinion that men and women
sport
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 program should be given equivalent TV coverage. In
this
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 essay, I would argue why
this
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 is not a smart idea. There is an array of reasons why TV producers are in favour of men’s
sport
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 competition rather than women’s. The most fundamental one is due to the prejudice of
gender
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. A great number of people find women games are boring and not
worthwhile whereas
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worthwhile, whereas
 men’s are regarded as fully conveying the spirit of sports.
This
Linking Words
 is because the public
attach
Suggestion
attaches
 women with household responsibility which means women’s physical capacity is pitifully devalued. Meanwhile, men are considered the symbol of strength and
therefore
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, men arouse higher public’s attention in terms of physical strength than women do. The
second
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 reason is the profit of the television station. It is evident that the majority of
public
Suggestion
the public
 are willing to allocate their money and time for their
favorite
something regarded with special favor or liking
favourite
men
Suggestion
men's
sport
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 teams. Thanks to that deep-ingrained bias of the audience, people working in broadcasting sector would gain enormous profit from advertising contracts only by dedicating its prime time to the most sensational
men
Suggestion
men's
sport
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 program.
However
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, the concept of giving equal airtime for both
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gender
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gender, sport
sport
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 games is unrealistic. It is probable that people who are of that opinion find that imbalance extremely unfair and they think equal coverage is a way to discourage
gender
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 discrimination. But I think they are ridiculously optimistic.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the main audience of
sport
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 shows is male, and giving women shows more airtime cannot change
this
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 group preference.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it could not make any big stride in confronting
gender
Use synonyms
 inequality. I believe that
the more practical
Suggestion
the most practical
 way is to educate. Women should be taught and learn about
different
Suggestion
different sports
a different sport
sport
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 since secondary schools, and have the chance to represent their schools to compete with others in the city. As women have learned and experienced how intriguing a
sport
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 can be, they will naturally
developed
Suggestion
develop
 a curiosity for national and international
women
Suggestion
women's
sport
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 programs. To conclude, we should expect a more practical approach because the outnumber of
men
Suggestion
men's
sport
Use synonyms
 shows over women’s is the tip of the iceberg and a quantitative change in TV coverage could not solve the roots of the problem.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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