IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems. What are these problems and how could they be reduced?

#people #levels #violence #films
There is no doubt that these days a lot of people are watching films to enjoy their time, especially with their kids,
however
, the question: Is violence in films nowadays affecting us socially and emotionally? Is considered a controversial issue, while I tend to believe that filmmakers have to respect the society and use their films to solve our problems
instead
 of making them violence. On one side of the argument, there are people who argue that we should have violence films in order to get excited and have fun.
Furthermore
, they argue that not everyone has to watch these films and it depends on the individual's personality and preference.
Also
, they believe that watching these films has to be monitored not only by guardians and parents, but
also
 by cinema's companies, so tickets should not be sold to any person below 18 years old.
For example
, cinemas in Kuwait are following strict rules regarding age limits, while I guess
this
 should be more strict.
On the other hand
, it is
also
 possible to consider it with the opposing case.These films should not be produced or shown in the cinemas and there has to be penalties on those who act them as they do not have any valuable meanings or aims.
Moreover
, various social problems become common in the society because of these movies and the lack of restrictions on the ages watching them
such
 as, suicide among teenagers, kids scratching themselves in order to copy what they have seen in a film. In conclusion, countries have to apply harsh rules on film makers and force them to make films that will benefit the society and the coming generations.
Submitted by aljaljoulilama on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • desensitization
  • empathy
  • aggressive behaviors
  • imitation
  • antisocial behavior
  • normalization
  • climate of fear
  • perceptions
  • mental health
  • aggression
  • emotional regulation
  • trauma-related symptoms
  • age ratings
  • critical viewing skills
  • nonviolent entertainment
  • film industry
  • regulate
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