Some people say that physical education classes are an important part of a child's education. Others believe that it is more important to focus on academics during school time. discus both these views, and give your opinion.
This
is an ongoing discussion regarding the importance of curriculum activities and studies. A group of individuals claims that physical tasks are more crucial in order to improve mental health.on the other hand
,some people believe that students should focus on books.Both situations have pros and cons. As far as I am concerned, I would like to hold the former opinion due to
some facts.
First of all,I will elaborate on the advantages to focus
on the academic system. Change preposition
of focusing
Firstly
,it is an outstanding way to improve reading skills as well as
writing.secondly
, it enhances the knowledge of pupils and gives them the ability to think outside of the box. Thirdly
,communication skills can cut the edge of creativity through debates.Last
but not least,maturity level grows up quickly.For example
,when I cast my mind back,I used to remember that,I got the first position in my school by dint of my outraged mentality,which I got through numerous dialogues with a different bunch of learners.
Alternatively,I am going to explain why some people give their vote to other activities instead
of studies.Furthermore
,they think that children's brains have no capacity to perform work on numerous works.In my opinion and also
scientists proved ,in childhood
kids have the ability to Add a comma
childhood,
perform
multitask and can learn more than one language.Verb problem
apply
Moreover
,after school time parents can play games with their children.
In conclusion, due to
these facts, I would prefer that in school time students need
focus on learning skills Verb problem
apply
instead
of playing games and watching animated movies,which can be available at home time.Submitted by afvirk786 on
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task response
Your essay responds to the task in a general sense, but there are areas for improvement. Try to explore both viewpoints equally and provide a more balanced analysis. For instance, you might elaborate more on the benefits of physical education for a child's overall development.
coherence cohesion
To improve your coherence and cohesion, work on connecting your paragraphs more logically. The transition between discussing academic benefits and the importance of physical activities should be smoother. Consider using more linking phrases or words to improve the flow.
task response
Although your ideas are clear, they could be more detailed. Instead of general statements, provide more specific examples and elaborate on them. This would help to clearly demonstrate your point of view and strengthen your arguments.
structure
Your introduction sets the context effectively by acknowledging both viewpoints before stating your stance. This is a good strategy for setting up the discussion.
structure
The conclusion summarizes your opinion clearly, reiterating your stance on the issue. This helps to give your essay a sense of closure.