Some people think that families have the most powerful influence on a child’s development, while others think other factors such as television, friend, music. etc. gave biggest effects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

About child development, two opposing views have been discussed, one of which is related to parenting effects on personal evolution, while the other is about environmental factors
such
as television, friends. From my perspective, families are the
first
and most important factors of early age development. According to the perspective of some, children can receive/get more influence from their families, since they might believe that social, educational and emotional needs
first
meet with the family. The rationale behind their thought might be the period that passes from birth to kindergarten, which is under the influence of the parents only; since
this
period of time has significant value in a child’s progress. I
also
support
this
point of view and believe that the backbone of a nature is created at that time. For some other people,
however
, the effect of televisions or friends might be more than family factor in a child’s improvement, since they might believe that specifically, human nature will be able to change in future. Yet, I am not on the same page as these people.
For instance
, to my way of thinking gained nature cannot be changed, but possibly manipulated for temporarily.
Therefore
, personal improvement is a permanent fact, so that the influence of the environment cannot be as powerful as parent’s one. In conclusion, what can be concluded from the aforementioned remarks is that
although
some individuals
such
as advocate families are the main factors of an individual's personality. I firmly believe that despite the effects of friends and television, parents are the key that shapes a child's personality.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Read more in the eBook

The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »

* free ebook for Premium users

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Try other services:

All the services are free for Premium users