IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Tourism is becoming increasingly important as a source of revenue to many countries, but its disadvantages should not be overlooked. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#tourism #source #revenue #countries
It is argued that many nations rely solely on
tourism
 as a source of income, other argue that the drawback caused by it should not be ignored.
This
 essay agrees that tourist
industry
 plays a vital role in economic growth,
however
, the negative impact of
tourism
 on the host country must be addressed.
To begin
 with tourist help nations generates considerable revenue.
That is
 to say, visitors bring in a large sum of income to the local economy, in the form of payment made for food and services.
Tourism
industry
 attracts international companies that invest in infrastructure and local businesses and provides a plate form for trade. It
also
 creates employment opportunities in the service sector, which benefits the society in living b
etter
Suggestion
the good
life.
For example
, an article in the Bloomberg newspaper stated that there was 3
0% decline
Suggestion
a 30 % decline
in the unemployment rate in Indonesia because of
t
ourism
Suggestion
the tourism industry
industry
.
On the other hand
, there are negative effects of
tourism
 on the host nations.
Tourism
 means more money investing in building hotels, bars, restaurants and shopping malls, which cause unequal distribution of state funds.
This
 inequality deprives many important sectors the necessary funds
such
 as health care and education.
Furthermore
,
tourism
 industries are often owned by foreign companies that does not benefit the local residents.
For instance
, a BBC news article states that in Africa, despite having a huge
tourism
industry
 people are still living in a poor state because it is owned by foreigners. In conclusion,
although
tourism
 benefits many countries in growing economically, the drawback caused by
this
industry
 must not be ignored.
Submitted by meehaca1 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: