Nowadays, many people buy things excessively. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people

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Nowadays,

consumerism

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has been receiving

Suggestion

has received

a great deal of public attention.

Although

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this

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trend is not without disadvantages, the upsides will justify these. On the one hand,

consumerism

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which has seen as an unstoppable rise offers a number of manifest benefits.

First

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, since mass production is significantly growing from

this

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trend, job opportunities are provided for everyone more than ever. In fact, professions,

such

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as office work or manual work, from factories and companies are available, helping people, especially the poor, access to employment to increase their

income

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Second

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, by going shopping at a frequent level, people can increase their living standards.

This

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means that those with

regular

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a regular income

income

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, whether average or

high

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higher

, have a desire to make their families fully equipped or to help them satisfy their shopping needs, leading to higher levels of happiness.

On the other hand

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consumerism

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would bring more adverse consequences than benefits.

First

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, in order to meet the soaring demands of customers, most companies and factories created the process of mass production, which would attribute to overproduction.

In other words

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, commodities, either manufactured or purchased, would

became

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become

the final production-wastes, leading to long-term environmental degradation as plastic bags or packages are fraught with difficulty to recycle.

Second

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, if a whole host of people are becoming impulsive customers, they would waste a large amount of money. A vast number of people are willing to spend beyond their

income

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on shopping constantly regardless of the consideration of their real needs, leading them to the burden of debt or the mortgage of personal property. In conclusion, it is an irrefutable that

consumerism

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has been becoming inordinately, the adverse impacts are weightier than the aforementioned benefits. By monitoring their shopping styles, people would control not only their

income

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but

also

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their quality surroundings.

Wed Mar 11 2020

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

transnational problems
climate change
ozone layer depletion
pollution
collaborative efforts
pooling of resources
expertise
technology
innovative solutions
international standards
race to the bottom
environmental standards
capacity
impacts
national sovereignty
independently
economic
social contexts
international consensus
legal
political systems
enforcement

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