IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many things that used to be done in the home by hands are now being done by machines. Does this development bring more advantages or disadvantages?

#home #hands #machines #development
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is no doubt that, the trend of technological innovation is rising exponentially. In that process, all the Multinational Companies are striving to introduce machines that can be in our day to day activities thereby decreasing human efforts while performing them. In my opinion, I think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages and they are discussed as follows. Starting with the disadvantages, it is obvious that introducing machines into household activities might make them lethargic.
This
Linking Words
 is because, if most of the everyday necessities are taken by machines,
then
Linking Words
 there cannot be much work left for people to do thereby decreasing their metabolism.
For example
Linking Words
, take the case of washing clothes, previously people used to spend hours cleaning their outfits and drying them but now it can be done with ease.
As a result
Linking Words
, people have been getting languid by sitting for hours in front of their televisions. These might lead to severe problems like obesity due to less metabolic activities.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the advantages are more as there is ample amount of leisure term that people can make use of. As much of household work is taken care by the machines, they could use the term for their career or their interests.
For example
Linking Words
, due to the machines people can invest their term in more creative work like painting, singing etc., Which could eventually be much more useful and could be more useful to the society too. Humans could be bogged down doing the routine things daily, so it is better to use the machines. As human brains are designed to be innovative and not doing the same old things again and again. In conclusion, much of the household activity should be taken care by the machines, thereby creating an ample amount of moment for the humans to reach their career goals, or being more productive to the nation with their creations.
Submitted by saeeujwal2 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Automation
  • Efficiency
  • Manual labor
  • Displacement
  • Homemaking skills
  • Technological advancements
  • Self-sufficiency
  • Resource depletion
  • Energy efficiency
  • Social dynamics
  • Operational understanding
What to do next:
Look at other essays: