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Writing Samples
Band 7

Advertising that targets children should be banned from our televisions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#targets #children #televisions
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TV channels ought to stop viewing adverts that are aimed at children. I completely agree with
this
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 statement as advertisements negatively influence children and encourage them to live unhealthy and materialistic lives. The main reason why children advertisements are bad is because children are easily influenced. Children cannot make decisions by themselves and cannot distinguish between good and bad products, unlike adults. As a consequence, they are attracted
to any
Accept comma addition
to, any
 advertisement
that is
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 colourful and beautiful and they become interested in any new item that targets them.
For instance
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, most children would want to buy a new toy if their favourite cartoon character was in the advert.
As a result
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, they start pestering their parents to buy them these products and toys even if they cannot afford it. Governments must ban all children advertisements because they are detrimental to children. Many companies advertise their fast food to children and make it look as attractive as possible.
This
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 can be exemplified by McDonald’s Happy Meal that comes with a new toy every month to encourage children to buy it.
As a result
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, children become addicted to fast food and suffer from obesity and health problems at
such
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 a young age.
Furthermore
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,
this
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 development impacts the whole family since they must all eat fast food with their children at restaurants. Another problem is that due to the excessive exposure to adverts, children can become materialistic as they would start thinking that acquiring new objects is all there is to life.
As a result
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, they grow into adults who value money and new items above anything else. In conclusion, the serious consequences of advertising to children must be recognized and,
therefore
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, they must be banned from televisions and other media.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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