IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people say that olympic games do not have any role to play in society. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

#people #olympic #games #role #society
Sports uplift the standard of health, wealth and good relationship. Presently, roughly masses assert that the Olympic games are worthless to be organized by nation. Here, I would like to discord with the given statement. There are manifold points to support my point of view,
first
 and foremost, the Olympic games are major sources for talented players to earn name and fame along with money.
Thus
, they will not get glorify the name of their family, but
also
 set prestige reputation of their country. Beside
this
, players can lead a standard lifestyle with a hefty sum of money earn through prizes.
Further more
in addition
Furthermore
 emphasizing on my point of view, today's masses are fully dependent on gadgets. Olympic games provide a platform for social communication by interacting with citizens of different nations.
Thus
, they become sociable.
Moreover
, sports help to boost the economy of the nation by travel and tourism of players from distinct countries. A research has shown that 30% of the economy boost with the help of Olympic games.
In addition
 to it, the masses do not have time for themselves as they are busy in earning their bread and butter. So, Olympic games give them a good opportunity to spend some time with their family and they can create some memories together. To be recapitulate, I firmly believe that children get many gadgets regarding sports like tennis, badminton, football, volleyball, rugby, and many more games. So, they get vast their area of knowledge in the field of the Olympic games.
Submitted by jasmeetkamboj88 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: