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Band 5

Nowadays, people spending more time away from their homes because they spend longer in their workplace. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

#people #time #homes #workplace
In present days, masses spend the majority of their
time
 away from homes due to work purpose.
This
 essay will discuss the benefits
such
 as promotion, business grown and learn new skills, while there is a drawback like the weak family bond. To commence with, people can achieve promotion due to their hard struggle. When people spend a long hour at their labour,
then
 they get many opportunities because of the owner of work want to develop a business;
therefore
, the holder provides better facilities and increase the pay scale of the worker.
As a result
, that individual gives a better living standard to his family.
Moreover
, people acquire new skills to utilize long hour on the job owing to the fact that they meet professional and literate civilization. They learn different things like language, lifestyle, and culture of others. Because in the workplaces, people visit from distinct locations.
On the contrary
,
first
 and the foremost drawback is the weak family bond. People who spend a large
time
outside they
Accept comma addition
outside, they
 do not have enough
time
 for family and lack of communication, they treat rude with family members.
Therefore
, sometimes their relationship leads to misunderstandings. People feel more stressful because they are not maintaining their personal lives. A survey was conducted by the USA, in 2018, which revealed that 60% of multitude got divorced due to lack of
time
 utilize with family.
Submitted by skdhindsa60 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • career progression
  • earning potential
  • enhanced productivity
  • skill sets
  • work-life balance
  • personal well-being
  • negatively impacting
  • increased stress
  • health issues
  • burnout
  • cardiovascular diseases
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