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Band 5

Governments should spend money on railway rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?

#governments #money #railway #roads
Generally, governm
ent has be
Suggestion
the government
en focusing on some aspect in improving the quality of life
su
ch as com
Accept comma addition
life, such
munication, health care and education. There is a need to look into the transportation system
especially railwa
Accept comma addition
system, especially
y rather than roads. In my opinion, more rail station should be built.There are some reasons I suggest
this
 should be implemented.
Firstly
, its will reduced the rate of pollution, it's has been noticed that majorit
y of peo
Suggestion
the majority
a majority
ple
both middle
Accept comma addition
people, both
 and upper class own a car and
also
 private organization uses vehicle
for co
Suggestion
the vehicle
a vehicle
mmercial purposes. Many of these mobile transport are not well maintained
as a result
 of
this
 poor maintenance it results in fume emitton
which
any strong feeling
emotion
emitting
causes air pollution within the society.
Also
, congestion due to more road transport stopping on highway
leads to tra
Suggestion
the highway leads
ffic delay. If trains are introduced, it will reduce the congestion and pollution rate.
Secondly
, rail transportation is more convenient and cheaper to access as compared to road.
For instance
, due to the inflation in the cost of petroleum, many bus drivers has to
inc
Suggestion
have
rease the price of transpo
rtation
Accept comma addition
transportation, hence
hence
 affecting the daily activities of some lower class people.
However
, if trains
station are co
Suggestion
the trains station
n
structed it wil
Suggestion
is constructed
l make the movement of less privileged individuals more accessible and improve the quality of life.
Lastly
, there is security of lifes a
nd pr
a characteristic state or mode of living
lives
life
operty from men of the underground world. Since, trains can't be stopped while moving, it will reduce the rate of kidnapping and stealing. To illustrate, some pastors were kidnapped on their way to a minister's confere
nce but with t
Accept comma addition
conference, but
he advent of rail travels,these
p
Accept space
,
roblem
could
Suggestion
problems
be forgotten. To conclude, focusing on Railway Station as more benefits and will improve the quality of life.
Submitted by victoriatolulopeige on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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