IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Parents today are more involved in their children's education than parents were in the past

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There has appeared endless discussion on
parents
Use synonyms
’
involvement
Use synonyms
. Many people state that
parents
Use synonyms
 today are more involved in
children’s
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
 than
parents
Use synonyms
 were in the past. Personally, I approve of
this
Linking Words
 statement.           On one hand, what has been put under consideration is
parents
Use synonyms
’
involvement
Use synonyms
. It is
prevalent
Add an article
a prevalent
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 knowledge that the growth of modern society provides
parents
Use synonyms
 with
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
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 conditions to pay more attention to
Use synonyms
children’s
Correct pronoun usage
their children’s
show examples
education
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is attributed to the fact that
world
Correct article usage
the world
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 is currently shifting and modern society
less
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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suffers from wars, widespread
epidemic
Fix the agreement mistake
epidemics
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 and poverty, which are able to prevent children from getting educated .
As a result
Linking Words
,
parents
Use synonyms
 have a tendency to give
children’s
Use synonyms
education
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 the highest priority.
Therefore
Linking Words
, minors are likely to be immensely offered learning resources
such
Linking Words
 as teaching faculties, online information, etc.
For
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 reason, there is a likelihood that
parents
Use synonyms
 today engage more in
children’s
Use synonyms
education
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. More importantly, the development of high-tech creates chances for
parents
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 to take care of
children’s
Use synonyms
education
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. Since
,
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apply
show examples
 the connection between youngsters and their
parents
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 is tightened.
Consequently
Linking Words
, they are capable of controlling what and how their minors learn.
Thus
Linking Words
, it is possible for
parents
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 to affect
children’s
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
. Beyond any doubt,
children’s
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
 has attracted much more
parents
Use synonyms
’ concern than it did in past.           
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is long held that
parents
Use synonyms
 nowadays are extremely busy
due to
Linking Words
 a large amount of work.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they are certain to take their
children’s
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
 for granted.
However
Linking Words
, it is just the surface of the issue. The fact remains that
parents
Use synonyms
 have their own rules and regulations about scheduling their time effectively.
This
Linking Words
 puts all of the workload under
Use synonyms
parents
Change noun form
parents'
parent's
show examples
 control.
Besides
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,
Add an article
the labor
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labor
Change the spelling
labour
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market has recently become more and more competitive.
As a result
Linking Words
, chances of getting a stable job are decreasing since young people are abundantly
inducing
Wrong verb form
induced
show examples
 and none of those wants to be unemployed. For
this
Linking Words
 reason,
parents
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, who are responsible for
children’s
Use synonyms
 future, are bound to have great concerns about
children’s
Use synonyms
 jobs.
As a consequence
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, they tend to encourage minors to learn intensively in order to get
a stable jobs
Correct the article-noun agreement
a stable job
stable jobs
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.
This
Linking Words
 leads to a full  
involvement
Use synonyms
 in children's
education
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. All in all, the idea that
parents
Use synonyms
 today ignore children's
education
Use synonyms
 is often possible to end in collapse.          In summary,
parents
Use synonyms
’
involvement
Use synonyms
 is the convincing reason for my approval. It is strongly suggested that people should carefully consider my writing to
guideline
Replace the word
guide
show examples
 a suitable decision.

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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