Some people believe that art plays a crucial role in society, while others think it is a luxury. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is often argued by a certain group of
people
, that
art
in various forms is an attribute of luxury
life
,
while
other
people
believe that
art
plays a vital role in
society
. In my opinion, creating
art
is a natural desire and
art
is very critical for
society
to showcase cultural
values
and heritage. The creation of
art
can be tracked throughout the development of humanity starting with cave drawing. Early humans created
art
like paintings pursuing different goals but the aesthetic side and capturing memorable moments of their
life
were the most prevailed.
This
means that making
art
is a natural human need. Almost nobody draws paintings or creates sculptures with
intent
Add an article
the intent
show examples
of earning a significant amount of money for luxury living.
For example
, many
people
consider
art
creation as a hobby. Some
people
enjoy photography, others like knitting or painting.
People
find
this hobbies
Change the determiner
this hobby
these hobbies
show examples
stress reducing
Add a hyphen
stress-reducing
show examples
and pleasant as activities to spend time.
Furthermore
, all types of human creativity display cultural
values
, social trends, and historical moments of modern
society
and ancestors as well.
Art
is a mirror of how we live and a mirror of the
values
that we carry.
For instance
, many details of medieval
life
can be found in pictures of Peter Brueghel the Younger.
Such
things help historians better understand the
life
structure of past societies.
Moreover
, many pieces of
art
were created to capture significant historical events.
For example
, the famous picture The Saint Bartholomew’s Day Massacre by Francois Dubois.
To sum up
,
art
is fundamental to what makes us human.
Art
creation is a natural need as it started to develop tens of thousands of years ago. The process of creating
art
brings enjoyment and reduces stress.
Moreover
, it keeps the heritage of our ancestors and displays the cultural
values
of
society
.
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task achievement
Although the main points are clearly presented, further elaboration on counter-arguments can make the essay even stronger. For instance, consider discussing in more detail why some may view art as a luxury and address their perspectives more comprehensively.
coherence cohesion
The transition between paragraphs is quite smooth, but to enhance coherence, consider using a wider variety of linking words. This can make the essay flow even more naturally.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both well-presented, providing a clear structure to the essay.
task achievement
The essay is rich with relevant examples that effectively support the main points, such as references to Peter Brueghel and Francois Dubois.
task achievement
The ideas presented are clear and comprehensive, making it easy for the reader to understand the writer’s position and reasoning.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Reflection of culture
  • Emotional and psychological relief
  • Economic contribution
  • Innovative thinking
  • Educational outcomes
  • Non-essential extravagance
  • Financial hardship
  • Accessibility
  • Inequality
  • Resource allocation
  • Basic needs
  • Cultural significance
  • Human condition
  • Mental well-being
  • Critical thinking
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