IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people argue that the government should spend money on public services and facilities but not on the arts. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #government #money #services #facilities #arts
There has been a debate in recent times that the
government
 should invest only on public service and facilities but
also
 the arts.
Although
 I agree that it is important to spend
money
 on public services and facilities, in art should not be completely neglected. The argument in favour of the authority should concern is investing in the arts.In order words, the arts an important role to play in entertainment
such
 as music, literature.
This
 will only help a part of standard living.
Howev
er
Accept comma addition
However, this
this
 might be a shortsighted view. It is indisputable that there are many benefits of spending
money
 on public services rather than investing in the arts.
Therefore
, the
government
 should spend a significant amount of the
government
 Budget on public services. There are two more vital reasons why investing
money
 on public service is essential.
Firstly
, the quality of life will be significantly improved through public services
such
 as schools, hospital, libraries.
For example
, if the
government
 spends enough
money
 on hospitals, the health of our society can be advanced.
Secondly
, the economy will increasingly develop thanks to the networks to create links to exchange products between regions
such
 as roads, internet.
For example
, An integrated transport network (maritime, land and inland waterway transport and civil aviation) will bring the smooth and speedy movement of goods and people in a city. In conclusion, the
government
 should consider spending
money
 on public services and facilities than on the arts.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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