We live today in an electronic information age. It is easier to be connected by technology yet many people seem to no closer to feeling happy in their lives. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#information #age #technology #people #lives

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The internet has made communication easy and accessible for everyone. Nowadays, humans are living in a computerized era, and as we know, technological advancements have made it easier to connect with people. But, still people are not satisfied with their day-to-day lives. I totally agree with the statement, because there is no face to face interactions anymore, it is only virtual.

To begin

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with, happiness comes when we are with family and friends.

First

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, due to modernization and busy lives, people tend to stick with their computers all day long,

instead

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of going out and meeting their pals and folks.

For instance

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, youngsters these days are more into their mobiles and laptops, and they keep on chatting with their friends via Facebook and Instagram.

In addition

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this

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, they do have a social life, but only virtual not in the real world.

Consequently

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, more and more teenagers are suffering from anxiety and depression.

Lastly

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, it is somewhere their parents fault as well, who does not encourage their kids to go out and meet their friends in person.

Secondly

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, computerization has made more and more people living a sedentary lifestyle. To exemplify

this

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, half of the people who work in the information technology sector have a nine to five job. Which means they just sit in front of their computer and work, and have minimal to zero interaction with the outside world. To add to

this

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, even in their free times they just keep on working on their projects.

Finally

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, social distancing is making more people to live unhealthy and unhappy life.

As a result

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, sometime they commit suicides as well, because they have no one to share their thoughts or feelings in the physical world. To sum up, modernization and technological upgrading are necessary, but what human beings can do with the these developments when there is no happiness is their lives. Work and interacting virtual does not mean you are living a happy life. Happiness comes with, when a person is surrounded by their loved ones.

Submitted by nav2270deep on Sat Mar 21 2020

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When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

337 words

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We live today in an electronic information age. It is easier to be connected by technology yet many people seem to no closer to feeling happy in their lives. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Computer games and films containing violence are popular today. Some people think that these are harmful for our society and the government should ban them. Other argue that such games and films are fun for entertainment. Discuss both views and give your opinion

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

More and more people use private cars instead of taking public transport. What are the reasons for this trend? How can the government encourage people to take public transport?

Many small businesses are being forced to close because they cannot compete with multinational corporations. What problems does this cause, and how can those problems be solved?

Compare new and old generation's interests you can mention. Advantages and disadvantages of their interest.