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Writing Samples
Band 6

Many feel that happiness is mainly an individual responsibility, while others feel that there are important external factors. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#happiness #responsibility #factors
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The meaning of
happiness
 is different for everyone, some people argue that economic prosperity, increased wages and reduced commodity prices are few factors that have a direct influence on
happiness
, while others claim that good interpersonal relationships, family bonding, healthiness and socialising contribute a lot in attaining
happiness
.
Firstly
, there is no doubt that people with good jobs and businesses have more prosperous lives than others ordinary citizen of the society, one of the reasons is that they have the financial capacity to fulfil their desires and buy things that give them pleasure. They are not confined to any boundaries while purchasing items of their interest
such
 as mobile, laptop, cars etc.
However
, perpetual efforts are required to sustain
this
 wealthy lifestyle that could have a dire consequence
on
Suggestion
of
 their personal
life
 in the long run due to lack of attention and care towards family members.
However
, health is a pivotal constituent of happy
life
.
This
 is not surprising that a healthy person enjoys a lucrative lifestyle and has more tendencies to participate in diverse activities that could be a source of joy for him.
Additionally
, healthy relations among family members and immediate social circle make people happier and relax,
for example
, children feel more
happiness
 while playing with their friends or when they received toys that not even worth a lot of money. Family relationship, personal aim and desire and a peaceful mind are other important aspects of being happy in our
life
. While money can ensure materialistic
happiness
, a poor can be happier than a rich in many cases. An honest and contented person can be a happy
person regardless
Accept comma addition
person, regardless
 of his economic status. To sum up, I would like to say that role of economic success is indispensable for achieving
happiness but
Accept comma addition
happiness, but
 others factors have
also
 a great consideration in
this
 regard. Even rich people with physical or psychological defectiveness are unable to enjoy the true colour of
life
.
Submitted by rubansingam19 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Individual responsibility
  • External factors
  • Personal choices
  • Mindset
  • Attitude
  • Mental health
  • Self-improvement
  • Socioeconomic status
  • Financial stability
  • Social relationships
  • Supportive family
  • Environment
  • Living conditions
  • Neighborhood safety
  • Cultural factors
  • Interplay
  • Dispositions
  • Case studies
  • Practical strategies
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