Today, TV channels provide men’s sport shows more than women’s sport shows. Why? Should TV channels give equal time for women’s sport and men’s sport?

Over the years, gender equality on
Television-
Correct your spelling
Sports
show examples
sports
networks
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
been imbalanced. I believe
this
trend has its own reasons;
however
, I strongly believe that female
athletics
Replace the word
athletes
show examples
should be given more broadcasting time.
Although
gender equality has come a long way, including UNESCO’s recognition of sport and physical activities as a human right in 1978,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gender equality in
sports
still has not come far enough, especially in TV productions. In my opinion, there are two main reasons leading to
this
issue. First of all,
male’s
Change noun form
male
show examples
sports
always get more attention from the audience;
therefore
, TV producers have a wider strategy to display men’s games on their channels.
Accordingly
, these programs earned more media coverage and sponsorship dollars.
Secondly
, some people have an argument that “
women’s
sports
are not interesting enough.” Even though the popularity of
women’s
sports
is growing, some still believe that “No matter how toughened a sportswoman may be, her organism is not cut out to sustain certain shocks.” Take
last
July’s
Women’s
World Cup soccer final
for example
. It was the most watched soccer
matches
Correct subject-verb agreement
match
show examples
—men’s or
women’s
—EVER in the US with nearly 25.4 million viewers. Yet the players were far less compensated than their male counterparts
However
, I would like to mention two reasons why we should give more attention towards
women’s
sport show
Fix the agreement mistake
sports shows
show examples
.
Firstly
, the more women figures playing
sports
, the more female audiences get inspired and practice exercises regularly. It could
bring
Verb problem
have
show examples
a long-term effect on
women’s
health and contribute to a healthy lifestyle in the community.
Secondly
, everyone should be given the same
chances
Fix the agreement mistake
chance
show examples
to be whatever they want to be. There should be no disparity in
sports
, nor in the workplace, nor in life. Genders should not be the thing to
define
Wrong verb form
defines
show examples
us or
inhibit
Correct subject-verb agreement
inhibits
show examples
us from performing our talents. In conclusion, the dominance of men’s athletics on television has been economically beneficial for the show producers and well-fulfilled the demand of the mass viewers.
Thus
, for the long-term development of a healthy lifestyle and equal
right
Fix the agreement mistake
rights
show examples
for both genders, the producers need to arrange a
balance
Replace the word
balanced
show examples
broadcasting schedule for both genders.
Submitted by maithingn on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
The essay addresses the task and presents a clear opinion. However, there is a need for a stronger introduction and conclusion that clearly summarize the main points.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a logical structure and the main points are supported. However, there is a need for stronger introductory and concluding paragraphs to improve overall coherence.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: