These days, in many countries, fewer and fewer people want to become teachers, particularly in secondary schools. What are the reasons for this, and how could the problem be solved?

A general ago, teaching in a high school was considered an extremely well-respected and popular
job
, and in some
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
this
is still true.
However
, in many parts of the world, there has been a sharp drop in the number of young people who want to become
highschool
Correct your spelling
high school
show examples
teachers
.
This
essay will look at the reasons for
this
and propose some solutions. One of the main causes of the
problem
is that
teachers
' salaries are lower than many other jobs.
Teachers
' pay has not kept pace with that of other professions,
such
as law or medicine. In the UK,
for example
, a doctor with five years' experience
wil
Correct your spelling
will
earn far more than a teacher with the same experience. The solution is for the government to raise
teachers
' pay significantly, which would attract more people into the profession. Another
problem
is that many
children
do not behave well in class.
That is
to say,
teachers
often have to deal with pupils who disobey them, which often causes them to give up teaching.
This
tends to put off potential
teachers
as well. To tackle
this
issue, parents must give their
children
a sense of respect for
teachers
, in order to make
children
behave better in class. A third cause of the
problem
is that
teachers
often have too much work to do. Most
teachers
are snowed under with marking and paperwork which means that they have to stay late at school and work at home in the evening.
As a result
, many
teachers
are tired and stressed, and their
job
has a negative effect on their family life. The way forward could be to cut
teachers
' hours
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and to take on more teaching assistants, which would make teaching an easier
job
.
To sum up
, teaching has become a much less popular
job
in many countries,
due to
reasons
such
as the salary, the
workin
Correct your spelling
working
workin'
hours and pupils' behaviour.
This
is a serious
problem
, and unless we can get more talented young people to become
teachers
, the education of our
children
will suffer. My view is that the main responsibility for solving the
problem
lies with parents and the government.
Submitted by npquynh96 on

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Ensure that your main ideas are fully developed and elaborated upon. While the essay addresses the main points, providing more detailed examples can further strengthen the argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on creating smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs. This will enhance the readability and flow of your essay.
Language
Be vigilant in spotting typographical errors such as 'A general ago' which should be 'A generation ago'. While minor, such errors can affect the overall impression and professionalism of your writing.
Language
Ensure a greater variety of complex sentence structures and vocabulary to showcase linguistic prowess, thus achieving a higher band score.
Language
Maintain a formal tone throughout the essay. Phrases like 'snowed under' are informal and should be replaced with more formal language to maintain consistency in style and tone.
Task Achievement
Always substantiate claims with specific examples or evidence. For instance, when mentioning the disparity in salaries, concrete data or a brief illustrative example could reinforce the point.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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