IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

As a result of tourism and the increasing number of people travelling, there is a growing demand for more flights. What problems does this have on the environment? What measures could be taken to solve the problems?

#tourism #people #demand #flights #environment #measures
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The booming international tourism has significantly contributed to the development of the world,
suggesting
Wrong verb form
suggested
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 by the economic growth in different industries, including
the
Correct article usage
apply
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aviation. Yet, the increasing number of flights is considered
as
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apply
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the root of major environmental issues, requiring necessary solutions from the government to combat the situation. It is evident that environmental deterioration
Correct word choice
and many
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many
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and many
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 current problems
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in
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of
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in
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Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the environment
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environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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 are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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is
Verb problem
apply
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partly attributed to the growing demand for international flights.
Firstly
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, the higher the number of flying
passenger
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passengers
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 is, the more carbon footprint and emission from burning fuel
is
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are
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released into the
environemnt
Correct your spelling
environment
environment
Use synonyms
.
As a result
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, not only does air pollution inevitably take place, but
also
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 the
long term
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long-term
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 and substantial impacts on the world are carried out,
for example
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, global warming or the
ozonlayer
Correct your spelling
ozone layer
 thickening ozone depletion.
Secondly
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, the aircraft manufacturing industry has been proven to account for
such
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 adverse effects on the Earth. Precisely, to produce solely an aircraft, enormous
quantity
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quantities
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 of raw materials are highly in need, from iron,
steel
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and steel
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 to coal, petroleum and natural gas. The procedures of both exploiting these materials and processing them
also
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 exacerbate the polluting issue which is ascribed to their intimidating emission of virulent pollutant particles.
Therefore
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, measures to combat environmental pollution from the
opration
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operation
 operation of
airplanes
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aeroplanes
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 should be taken by both the government and individuals. From the government perspective/As for the former, imposing higher taxes on the aviation industry sector would lead to a higher price in terms of
plane
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a plane
the plane
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ticket
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tickets
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, diverting people towards other more affordable
afforable
Correct your spelling
affordable
 yet greener/environmentally-friendly means of transport for
traveling
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travelling
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,
such
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 as boats or electrical trains.
Along with
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 that, social campaigns on protecting the
environment
Use synonyms
 should be promoted and implemented promptly to raise
people
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people's
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 awareness and educate their
traveling
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travelling
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behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
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.
Secondly
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, if people profoundly acknowledge their important role by reducing the frequency
in
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of
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traveling
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travelling
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 by plane, environmental issues can be easily alleviated. Taking the young climate
activise
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activist
activists
activism
 Greta Thunberge as an example, to responsibly prevent
climage
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climate
 climate
changes
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change
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, she has given up on plane
traveling
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travelling
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 to minimize
the
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apply
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aircraft emission on the whole.
This
Linking Words
 ushers in many adolescents being inspired by Greta’s action to make
intervention
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an intervention
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 in saving the planet. In conclusion, detrimental impacts on the
environment
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arising
Wrong verb form
arise
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 from both producing and operating
airplanes
Change the spelling
aeroplanes
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.
Therefore
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
governments and citizens should take the initiative to create influential changes and foster environmental sustainability.

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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