It is suggested that all young adults should undertake period of unpaid work, helping people in the community.Does it bring more benefits or drawbacks to the young people? Some people say that E books and technology will totally replace traditional newspapers and magazines. Do you agree or disagree?

#adults #period #work #people #community #e #books #technology #newspapers #magazines

The youth of today is generally considered to lack social knowledge and experience, which are of crucial importance in the future development. To solve

this

problem some people suggest that they should undertake a period of voluntary industry in the local community helping people around them. Personally, I believe that making young people do voluntary industry will be very beneficial for the youth as well as for the community and the negative effects of

such

an approach would be negligible. Undoubtedly, it will benefit both the young people enormously if they do a certain period of unpaid work.By helping the elderly, the sick and the disabled directly, or participating in charitable activities like raising funds or offering free consultation, young people will certainly gain and accumulate some valuable

first

hand experience and know more about the company.

Moreover

, young people with

such

experiences are more likely to become the most motivated ones in academic study or at the task, and eventually become responsible citizens of the society. As far as the community is concerned, it will definitely become better with so many zealous young volunteers who are ready to help.

However

, there may be some disadvantages if young provide free service helping people in need.

For example

, it may conflict with their normal study or industry if not arranged well.

Then

the result maybe not as desirable as what is expected. But I think

this

sort of problem can be easily taken care of by meticulous planning by the school authorities. To conclude, competitiveness of modern life and influence of global culture has isolated children from the neighbourhood. So making them do some voluntary production would be very beneficial to make today's children feel part of the company they live in.

Submitted by uvajaykumar99 on Fri Mar 27 2020

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

290 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

altruism
foster
employability
empathy
burnout
prolonged
perpetuate
accessibility
tactile
demographic
niche markets
collectible editions
coexistence
digital divide

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