IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Goverments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agre or disagree with this statement?

#goverments #money #railways #roads #agre
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It is crucial to consider how the government should spend its money. Whereas some people believe that investments should be focused on railroads rather than highways, others claim it must be the other way around. In my view, despite the roadways having arguably facilities, the track transport system can offer many more benefits.
Firstly
Linking Words
, trains is considered much greener to the planet than cars and motorcycles.
This
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 is because the former can carry dozens of people more than the latter in the same trip,
besides
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 applying considerably less fuel. To illustrate, while a car going from Chicago to New York could only take 5 people, at maximum, a caravan would do the same journey with hundreds of people inside it, emitting a fewer amount of harmful gases per person in the ozone layer.
Thus
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, if train mode was encouraged and massively funded by the government, the country would be able to reduce its emission of greenhouse gases, so helping the world's nature.
Furthermore
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, using railways is more economically sustainable than the usage of roads. The reason for
this
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 is that it is cheaper for companies to send their products through trains
instead
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 of buying or renting large numbers of lorries to transport it by road. A farm,
for instance
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, is likely to drain all its harvest in just one train trip as it can be loaded with thousands of kilos. If the farm chose to do it using the roads,
however
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, hundreds of trucks would be necessary to do the same job. In conclusion, due to its sustainability and economically appealing advantages, I believe governments must invest their money in the convoy method
instead
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 of the road mode.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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