IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

In many cities an increasing number of people do not know their neighbours and there is lack of a sense of community. What are the causes of this problem? How can it be solved?

#cities #people #neighbours #lack #sense #community
The over population of cities has caused a lot of social problems, including an ever growing social distance despite the closeness of physical distance. These problems
seems
Suggestion
seem
 to be rooted in some different areas and some remedies could be possible. The
first
 reason for
this
 problem is probably the overwhelming amount of work and stress in cities.
This
 has kept people too busy with their own lives that they do not find the
time
 to spend with their neighbours. Another reason could be the effect of the media; since it has replaced the fun and entertainment people used to have when gathered in their crowds.
Finally
, the speed of life and the amount of information flow cannot be ignored. That's why most city dwellers consider spending
time
 with neighbours as a waste of
time
. Turning to possible solutions, by decreasing working hours and increasing free
time
, we can hope more people would spend more
time
 with their neighbours. The media could
also
 play an important role
this
, showing and teaching how people could benefit both emotionally and psychologically if they spent more
time
 with their neighbours.
Lastly
, families should leave their comfort zones and get to know the people
next
 door, and
also
 teach their children to do so. In conclusion, there seems to be three main reasons leading to social isolation in cities and the three remedies mentioned might be helpful if people and the authorities cooperate.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: