Some people think that the main factors influencing a child's development these days are things such as television, friends, and music. Others believe that the family still remains more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays, children have become addicted to electronic items, and
also
tend to give more importance to their friends and favourite
music
.
Although
many argue that these parameters have potential effects on a
child
's growth, I strongly believe that family plays a vital role in building a
child
's character.
This
essay will shed light on both these views. On one hand, some
factors
Accept comma addition
factors, such
such
as
television
, friends, and
music
are believed to be have more influence on children.
For instance
, news reports shown on
television
keep children updated with
latest information
Suggestion
the latest information
around the world.
Besides
, children
also
obtain inspiration by watching talent shows on TV. Apart from
television
, children spend plenty of time with their friends and like listening to
music
. Friendship teaches them how to be supportive and now maintain trust.
Moreover
, another benefit
music
is that it keeps children calm and focused on their studies.
On the other hand
, the formation of a
child
's personality is mostly based on the family, in which he has grown up
.
Accept space
.
The basis values
such
as respect, discipline and right behaviour can only be taught by responsible parents.
Moreover
, a
child
learns family traditions and religious rituals by observing their elders.
For example
, during my childhood, I had always followed the footsteps of my parents and
grand parents
a parent of your father or mother
grandparents
in numerous
ways
Accept comma addition
ways, such
such
as white putting on particular clothes according to occasions as well as respectfully treating my guests. Despite the fact that factors external to family have an impact on a
child
's development, family has the most significant potential to turn a
child
into a well-behaved adult. To recapitulate,
this
essay illustrated that
television
, friends and
music
are some of the key factors in the process of a
child
's development;
however
, family is the most prominent one among these factors.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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