MANY PEOPLE ARE NOW SPENDING MORE AND MORE TIME TRAVELLING TO WORK OR SCHOOL. SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT THIS IS A NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT WHILE OTHERS THINK THERE ARE SOME BENEFITS. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION.

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Introduction

Time

Use synonyms

is the most precious thing we have nowadays. Individuals are travelling far for their work and education. I believe there are more disadvantages than advantages to

this

Linking Words

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

viewpoints.

Body paragraph 1

On the one hand, there are people who argue that commuting greater distances is beneficial. They think one might read a book or listen to a podcast

while

Linking Words

travelling. I feel

this

Linking Words

can be done better at home, where you are relaxed

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and more concentrated.

This

Linking Words

is because you are not distracted by traffic.

For instance

Linking Words

while

Linking Words

driving you have to pay attention to cars and pedestrians.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, when a person is multitasking

while

Linking Words

driving, the chances of accidents

increases

Correct subject-verb agreement

increase

show examples

In contrast

Linking Words

, if a person is paying full attention to only driving, the probability of any mishap decreases.

Body paragraph 2

On the other hand

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, spending more

time

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travelling wastes a lot of

time

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

is because an average person spends a couple of hours commuting.

For example

Linking Words

, if someone's school or workplace is

20KM

Correct your spelling

20 km

away. It takes around an hour

driving

Change the verb form

to drive

show examples

This

Linking Words

time

Use synonyms

could have been spent on more important things like spending

time

Use synonyms

with your family.

In addition

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, if you save

this

Linking Words

time

Use synonyms

, you get more to do things that

matters

Change the verb form

matter

show examples

like working or studying.

Conclusion

To conclude

Linking Words

, having your work closer to your home has more positives than negatives. You can enjoy life more by saving crucial

time

Use synonyms

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and being safe on the road by not getting distracted.

As a result

Linking Words

, you are saving money because

time

Use synonyms

is money these days.

Apr 6, 2020

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coherence and cohesion

Consider providing a clearer structure to your essay by using more defined paragraphs for each viewpoint and your opinion. Having a more distinct separation can help improve clarity.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples or personal anecdotes to support your points. This makes your argument stronger and more relatable to the reader.

task achievement

Ensure that your conclusion summarizes the key points discussed in the essay and reinforces your opinion more forcefully. This can help leave a stronger impression on the reader.

task achievement

You present a balanced discussion of both views before giving your opinion, which is important for this type of essay.

coherence and cohesion

Your ideas are generally clear and flow logically, making it easy for the reader to understand your arguments.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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MANY PEOPLE ARE NOW SPENDING MORE AND MORE TIME TRAVELLING TO WORK OR SCHOOL. SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT THIS IS A NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT WHILE OTHERS THINK THERE ARE SOME BENEFITS. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION.

Studying with a group of students in a classroom is more beneficial than learning online at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

We are living in a throw-away society and things are used in a shorter period I of time and thrown away. What are the causes of this phenomenon and what problems might it cause?

Some people think that a huge amount of time and money is spent on the protection of wild animals. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion

More and more young people from wealthy countries are spending a short time doing unpaid work, such as teaching and building houses for communities in poorer countries. What are the reasons for this? Who benefits more from this, the communities or these young people?

It is often considered that change is more beneficial to people than trying to avoid it and have everything remain the same. Do you think the advantages of change outweigh the disadvantages