IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some People Think That The Government Should Provide Funding For Arts. Others, However, Believe That The Money Should Be Spent On Public Health And Education. Discuss Both These Views And Give Your Own Opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Public concern has arisen about whether the
government
Use synonyms
 should provide funding for arts or spend money on public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
. I tend to believe that the
government
Use synonyms
 should allocate more financial resources to public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
. Public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
 surely require more
government
Use synonyms
 funding for the following reasons. The primary reason we have to take into consideration is that public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
 are the prerequisites of a healthy society. It is generally believed that looking after public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
 dramatically reduces the crime rate in the society. Apart from that, public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
 are needed by most people. It is widely acknowledged that more people rely on
government
Use synonyms
 funding in terms of public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
; as a consequence, the needs of the majority must be catered for
first
Linking Words
. More importantly, without public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
, the arts will not have any foundation to be appreciated.
In other words
Linking Words
, nobody feels in the mood for the arts if their needs for public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
 cannot be met. I concede that the arts play an important role in our lives. Despite that, the
government
Use synonyms
 must prioritise areas that require funding. It is commonly accepted that public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
 require more funding than the arts. On balance, I would assert that the
government
Use synonyms
 would be well-advised to spend more money on public
health
Use synonyms
 and
education
Use synonyms
 so that the world can become a better place.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: